


SQUEEZE!

by Buttispams



Category: Political RPF - US 21st c.
Genre: Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Married Life, Phone Calls, Romance, otp: wait that's my word
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:42:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27447319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Buttispams/pseuds/Buttispams
Summary: CHASTEN: "Hey, babe, I tried calling, but you were busy, again. I know it’s not your fault, and I’m not blaming you, so don’t think I am, but I just can’t do this right now, I need to go home for a couple days. I’m sorry. I love you."
Relationships: Chasten Buttigieg/Pete Buttigieg
Comments: 6
Kudos: 32





	SQUEEZE!

**Author's Note:**

> The inspiration for this came from the part in Chasten's book where he talks about how he and Pete would send the word "Squeeze" to one another while on the trail.
> 
> *It's late, and I'm tired, this probably has a lot of grammatical errors, but hey, too bad, you got new fic.*

**Chasten:** _Hey, babe, I tried calling, but you were busy, again. I know it’s not your fault, and I’m not blaming you, so don’t think I am, but I just can’t do this right now, I need to go home for a couple days. I’m sorry. I love you._

After a brief talk with Pete’s staff and Emily, Chasten was on his way to the airport to get on the first flight home. He loved Peter, and was so incredibly grateful to be able to go on out the trail and advocate for him. The world deserved to know the real Pete and he was more than willing to share him, but sometimes it was hard.

Today, for instance, was one of those hard days. He spent the day at a LGBT center in Vegas, making him both physically and emotionally exhausted. He knew Peter needed his help, but he needed to sleep, in his own bed, in the safety of his own home.

Over the past couple months Pete’s team had become very accommodating if Chasten needed a couple days off, or if he and Peter really needed to see each other. They were always able to meet every request, even if it was sudden.

Chasten was startled when his phone buzzed in his hand. Usually when Peter was busy, he was busy, and even drafting a quick text often proved impossible, yet he still took those couple of seconds for Chasten, and it was these little moments that reminded Chasten of why he loved Peter, and why the country needed him. A president who was always on, and ready to go, but who was also compassionate and willing to take a second to make sure everyone was well off.

Peter: _It’s okay love, take your time, you come first, always. I’m in a meeting right now, that’s why I couldn’t answer, but as soon as I’m free I’ll call you back. I love you too, text me if you need anything, and say hi to the dogs for me, I miss them… and you._

Chasten smiled down at his phone, then sighed, their schedules never seemed to line up.

**Chasten:** _Once you’re done with your meeting I’ll be on the plane, so that won’t work. And then, by the time I’ve landed, you’ll be at your event, so I guess just text me when you’ve finished your day, and hopefully I’ll still be awake. I miss you too._

Another couple of minutes, and the SUV was pulling up at the airport. Because the flight was scheduled so last minute, he only had an hour and a half before he had to be at the terminal, he just hoped there wasn’t a long line at security.

Thankfully, there wasn’t, and he was passing the gates heading for his own within 45 minutes. “ _A few minutes to sit down, for once_ ”, Chasten thought, as he made his way to the seating area. He closed his eyes, focussing on his breathing, thinking only positive thoughts that he would be home in just a few hours.

He almost had his head completely cleared when his phone buzzed again in his hands, this time an incoming call instead of a text.

“Hello?”

“Chasten, sweetie, hey.” Peter’s voice was soft and calming, and Chasten knew the instant he heard it that it was exactly what he had needed all day. Just the soothing voice of his husband. “I only have a minute, but I wanted to tell you I love you.”

Chasten let out a deep, audible, breath that he hadn’t even realized he was holding in. “I love you, too, so much. But, what-... I thought you were in a meeting.”

“I am, but I told them I needed a minute, and I stepped out.” The line was quiet for a few moments. Neither of them really knew what to say, and Chasten just relished in listening to Peter breathing. “Um, do you maybe want to talk about what’s going on?”

“I do, yeah,” Chasten was silent again, then, “But I have a plan to catch, and you have a meeting.”

“My meeting can wait, talk to me, love.”

Chasten opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out. Everything he wanted to say was on the tip of his tongue, but he was so worried that as soon as he started letting it all out, he wouldn’t stop, and neither would his tears. Before he was given the chance to say anything, the announcement came through that it was time for him to board. “I have to go.”

“I’ll call you later, okay?” Peter waited until he heard a hum of agreement. “And Chasten? I love you, more than anything.”

Chasten swallowed the forming lump in his throat, he could not cry, not here. “I love you, too.” 

When Chasten finally landed, it was only 3:00pm. Peter’s event was only just getting ready to start, and then he would have interviews, photos, and god knows what else before he would be back at the hotel, able to talk to Chasten, but only for a short period of time, because he would need his sleep for another 15+ hour day.

“ _It’s all worth it,_ ” he tells himself. The distance, the constant on the go, the death threats. It’ll all be worth it when the country is healed. _The death threats_ . The reason he needed to go home, the reason he needed to know Peter loved him, _the reason he needed to hear Peter breathing_.

_God_ , he couldn’t tell him, not yet at least.

Typically, when these happened, he didn’t know about it, and if he did, they weren’t enough to worry him. They were always empty. Just some random person in their mom's basement who had nothing better to do with their lives than say horrible, anonymous, things to someone simply because of who they loved. But today was different. He couldn’t quite figure out why. It was the same as all the rest. A rushed statement, lacking detail, of how they wanted Peter dead, how he sinned and didn’t deserve to live, how his life only negatively impacted the future of America.

While on the plane, sitting alone with his thoughts, Chasten figured that maybe the reason this one was so impactful was because it was about Peter. Most often, when he found out about a threat, it was targeted at him, and he only concluded it was a threat because he would “randomly” have more security that day. Maybe it was because this threat came in when he and Peter were apart, and hadn’t seen each other in a while, and it was mostly affecting him because of how much he missed his husband. Or maybe, this time was worse because the last time he saw Peter was early in the morning when they were heading different ways across the country, and the night before they had gotten into a stupid argument. And it was stupid, to the point where Chasten couldn’t even remember the context of it, although he knew it was mostly built on deeper feelings that neither one of them were ready to air yet, but all he could think of now, was _“what if”_.

What if this time the threat is real? What if he doesn’t get to see Peter ever again? And what if the last thing he had ever said to Peter in person was “if that’s how you feel, then why did you marry me?”, followed by an angered, “I’ll be on the couch”?

Of course they had made up since then. As soon as he came to his senses the next day he and Peter shared a rushed phone call of “I’m sorry”, “I love you, so much”, “I didn’t mean it”, and “marrying you is the best thing I ever did”. 

But what if Chasten never got the chance to say it to his face again?

Once home, and acquainted with the dogs, Chasten made his way up to his and Peter’s bedroom. He unpacked his bags, knowing full well they’d have to be repacked in two days, but wanting to feel some sense of stability in his life, settled onto the bed, and changed into ‘comfy clothes’ to watch an episode or two of mindless tv.

He picked up his phone, noting that if Peter was on schedule, he would be walking on stage in front of a crowd in Iowa, in about five minutes.

**Chasten:** _Good luck, babe, you’re gonna kill it out there._

More dreadful thoughts filled Chasten as he hopefully awaited a response. _What if this is when they strike?_

Peter: _Thanks love, you always know just what I need to hear._

**Chasten:** _Always ;)_

**Chasten:** _And I really am sorry about the other day, you know that, right?_

Peter: _Of course, Chasten, I know. I’m sorry too. I love you, talk later._

**Chasten:** _I love you, too._

It was the third time that day that Chasten had told Peter he loved him, yet it still didn’t feel like enough. It would never be enough.

To pass the time, and not spend the next three hours obsessively worrying and checking twitter for any ‘Breaking News at a Pete Buttigieg rally’, Chasten started his tv show, and went online to order take out.

It wasn’t until almost 4 hours later that Chasten heard from Peter again.

Peter: _Event went well, couldn’t have done it without your luck._

**Chasten:** _Yes you could’ve, but I’ll still take the credit._

Chasten smiled down at his phone, _thank god he was okay_ , although it was getting late, and he was pretty sure Peter still had a long list of things to do, there most likely would not be much of a chance for them to talk later.

  
  


**Chasten:** _What else do you have to do today?_

Peter: _I’m on my way to an interview now, then I have two meetings with the press, and then I should be on my way back to the hotel. Hoping for about 10:30pm._

**Chasten:** _Don’t stress, if it’s late, I understand, we can talk another time._

Peter: _I know, but I really want to hear your voice, and I think we need to talk, not just about today._

**Chasten:** _We should, yeah._

Peter: _Anyways, I better get back to it, the sooner I finish all this, the sooner I can call you._

Chasten sent out another quick, “I love you” text.

Around midnight, Chasten gave up on waiting for Peter’s call. The last thing he had heard from Peter was a text at 10:50pm saying that he was still in a meeting, and wasn’t sure when he’d be back at the hotel. At this point, Chasten just assumed that Peter got back to the hotel and went right to bed.

He tried to get some sleep, really, but after hours of tossing and turning, Chasten sat up in bed with a sigh, flicking on the bedside lamp, and grabbing his phone.

**Chasten:** _Hey, babe, are you still up?_

**Chasten:** _Who am I kidding, of course you’re not, I guess I just need you right now._

**Chasten:** _I can’t sleep. All I can think of is you, and how much I wish you were here, so I could hold you and kiss you and just feel you next to me._

**Chasten:** _Peter, I’m sorry it’s late and I’m blowing up your phone, and I know you won’t see this until tomorrow anyways, but I’m scared. I love and miss you, so much, just please know that._

**Chasten:** _SQUEEZE_

Chasten sent the final text, “squeeze”, it was a simple word, but to them it meant so much more. It was a virtual hug, a reminder that they would always be there for one another, a way to say “I love you” without actually saying it. Chasten sighed, returning his phone to the bedside table, pulling Buddy closer to his chest hoping to get some sleep.

Finally, he started to doze, Buddy’s warm breathing beside him calming his nerves, he was just about asleep when his phone started buzzing.

“Hello?”

“Chasten, love, what’s going on?”

“Peter, it’s the middle of the night what are you doing up?”

“I got up to use the bathroom, and I don’t care what time it is. I woke up to all these texts from you, and quite frankly, I’m scared. Please, just talk to me.”

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have texted you, you need your sleep.”

“Well you did text me, now talk to me.”

“I just got so anxious, I guess. I know it’s stupid, and we’re not supposed to take it to heart too much, but I read one of the letters yesterday, and that’s why I needed to come home.”

The line was so silent Chasten may have thought that Peter hung up, but he could ever so slightly make out the soft, steadiness, of Peter’s half asleep breathing.

“I’m sorry, Chasten,” Peter’s voice was uneven, a little higher than usual. “I never, ever, wanted you to feel afraid, like you were in danger. I promised your mother I would take care of you, and protect you, and I’m failing.”

On the last word, Peter’s voice broke, and Chasten could hear him swallow thickly, followed by a sniff.

“Peter, please don’t cry, it’s not you, you didn’t fail anyone, me, or my mother, it wasn’t about me. The threat was about you. That’s why I’ve been texting you all day, constantly telling you that I love you, because I needed you to know and I wanted to hear it back, just in case.”

“Chasten I- I’m okay.”

“I know. Thank god.” There was more silence between them. A calm washed over Chasten as he let out the thoughts that had been overwhelming him all day. “When do I get to see you again.”

“When do you want to see me again?”

“Right now.”

“Chasten, I-”

“I know, you can’t, I’m sorry.”

“I’ll try to get something arranged for tomorrow, or the day after, okay?”

“Please do. I miss you so much.”

“I miss you too, Chasten, and I’m so sorry about the other night. I should have never spoken to you like that.”

“No, Peter, it wasn’t you, _I’m_ sorry. You are under so much stress, and you don’t deserve to have to deal with my dramatics.”

“You weren’t being dramatic. You had every right to be upset.”

Chasten released a single airy chuckle. “You are way too understanding, but that’s why I love you.”

“I love you too. And I would love to keep hearing your voice, but unfortunately I have to be up in three hours.”

“Yeah, I know. Get some sleep, babe, but can you stay on the phone, I want to hear you, I know it’s stupid, but it’ll help me sleep.”

“Of course love, and it’s not stupid, I like hearing you too. Get some rest.”

Within only a few minutes Chasten heard the soft, familiar snores of his husband. It sounded a little distant from the phone, but if he closed his eyes, he could believe that Peter was right beside him. So, within the next couple minutes, he too had fallen asleep.

When Chasten woke up the next morning, he felt lighter, excited, almost, to get back on the trail and support the man who proved to always be there when he needed him most. He decided to message his team, and let them know that he’d be ready to go the next day, needing one more day to cool down and catch up on sleep.

He heard back from both his team and Peter around the same time a few hours later, and Peter was happy to inform him that he would be back on the road the next day, and back with Peter. The rest of the day went by in a blur, he packed back up his things, enjoyed a few more precious hours with the dog, and then it was off to bed to be up for a 6am flight to Iowa.

When he got to Peter, he was a little disappointed that it was at an event, but Peter being Peter, managed to arrange a few private moments for them before getting up in front of the crowd.

Chasten’s car pulled up, and he was ushered inside, _finally,_ he was brought back to the holding room. He locked eyes with Peter, and didn’t dare look away until they were in each other's arms, both wrapped up in a tight hug. Peter rested his chin on Chasten’s shoulder as he nuzzled right into Peter’s neck, inhaling deeply, instantly relaxing with a sigh.

“You okay?” Peter asked, lifting a hand to run through Chasten’s hair.

“So much better, now.” Chasten placed a kiss to Peter’s neck before pulling back, but still keeping his arms around him.

Peter moved his hand down to rest on Chasten’s cheek, gently rubbing his thumb under his. He closed his eyes and leaned in for a much needed kiss.

“Okay, I gotta go,” Peter said, reluctantly moving back, “but we’ll talk later at the hotel.”

Chasten went in for one last quick hug. “Actually, I think I’m good, just seeing you fixed everything.”

“Good, I’m glad.” Peter pecked his cheek but before leaving the room he added, “but we’re still talking about this later.”

**Author's Note:**

> I'm still writing my other stuff it's just, uh, taking a while. oops


End file.
